Today I took an exam.
And as I looked up at the testing center screen that magically flashes my score among so many other hopeful students' grades, I cringed.
Let's just say, I've had much better exam scores.
I cried.
But if you remember correctly, I may have mentioned here that I was going to work on loving myself. I decided that I wouldn't let grades define me. I wish I could tell you I didn't define myself by my grades in that moment. But I did. I think a bazillion thoughts rushed my brain at once like the Utes rushed the Lavell Edwards Football Field. The timing was all wrong, and lets face it-- it was all kinds of poor sportsmanship. But my thoughts were eager to celebrate their victory over my self esteem.
How can I be a critical care nurse if I can't perform well on paper?
Easy. Just because I didn't answer the questions the way a professor, the NCLEX, or a textbook would want me to answer them-- doesn't mean that I am a failure.
So I picked myself back up, looked myself square in the eyes in the mirror, and told those rotten negative thoughts: "Grades do not define me."
Because they don't. Thank goodness for awesome roommates who remind me to love myself.
Now maybe I should focus on becoming a little bit more like this munchkin:
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